Can we just talk about 2018 fashion for a minute?
Look, I’m not mad, I’m not upset. Just tell me the truth.
Have you ever worn something like THIS?
Do you long for moonlit walks on the beach wearing patterns like THESE?
Would you ever strut your stuff in this fabulous denim and green faux fur ruff jacket?
No one looks good in this. Not even Emma Watson could look chic in this.
A ten minute trip to H&M is enough to make me weep. Come on, ladies…
Can someone tell me what’s with all the hideous clothes for sale these days?
Is it all a secret joke? Like is everyone just pretending to love the latest 2018 fashion trends, while inside they’re screaming for the sweet release of death?
Or do people really love elbow pom poms?
Maybe it’s pure ’80s and ’90s nostalgia that has people dreaming of wearing the contents of their 64 crayon Crayola box. I swear I can smell wax and apple juice just looking at this sweater.
Or maybe each fresh affront to the gods of aesthetic taste is like a personal challenge: “Dress like I raided both my grandpa and my little brother’s closet? Oh yeah, I can totally pull this shit off.”
Last but not least we have the “a policeman just pulled me out of the river, and now he’s letting me wear his jacket while I wait for the therapist” look. Ironic? Drop-dead sexy? Neither?
So… 2018 fashion. What do you think?
Maybe I’m being too harsh, or maybe I’m taking fashion too seriously. Maybe I’m just overanalyzing the whole clothes shopping experience… again.
Ladies, am I missing something here? Fill me in!